Saturday, January 22, 2005

United States: The truth about Red and Blue States

(As described in a mass distribution email newsletter. I do not claim authorship of this material. I am just displaying it for a larger audience. It's humorous... but - for the most part - oh so true!)
Blue States -- Red States

Let us divide the country now. Blue States ... Red States ...

With the Blue States in hand, the Democrats have firm control of .....
80% of the country's fresh water,
over 90% of our pineapple and lettuce,
92% of all fresh fruit production,
93% of the artichoke production,
95% of America's export quality wines,
90% of all cheese production,
90% of the high tech industry,
The majority of the US economy,
Produce 82% of the arts and culture,
Most of the US low-sulfur coal,
All living redwoods, sequoias and condors,
Most of the best comedians,
All the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus
Harvard, Yale, Amherst,
Berkeley, Caltech and MIT.
We can live simply but well.

The Red States, on the other hand, now have to
cope with the results of "Christian values" ....

68% of all divorces,
82% of all incest,
79% of all crimes of abuse to children,
81% of all crimes of abuse to women
86% of all hate crimes,
89% of all executions
And they have to cope with God's response:
88% of all obese Americans (and their projected health care cost spike),
96% of devastating US floods,
92% of all US mosquitoes,
100% of all tornadoes,
90% of all hurricanes,
99% of all Southern Baptists,
100% of all Televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.
A high price to pay for controlling the presidency.
Additionally, of those in the Red states ....
38% believe Jonah was actually eaten by a whale,
62% believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws,
44% believe that evolution is just a theory,
53% that Saddam Hussein was involved in 9/11
92% believe that Bush was fairly elected by a majority
And, most difficult to comprehend,
61% believe that Bush is a person of high moral

1 comment:

baseball awards said...

Great facts you have here.

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